There are many referral tips on the internet. However, those who succeed are far and few in between. Actually, most referral systems can work, it is the people who don't implement them properly.

Most people do not want to ask for referrals for fear of disrupting stable relationships wtih existing clients. But the situation need not be awkward. Imagine a scenario where a prospect is sitting in front of you. You just wrapped up a sleek presentation, explaining what you do and why it works.

That is, you made a “performance promise.” Your client asks you, “How much does it cost?” You tell them and they are happy with the price. A contract is inked and the relationship is in balance.

But this relationship is thrown out of balance when you ask for referrals, “Err... if you don't mind, can you refer those you know to me?

A deathly silence greets you. Question like this invokes the “Law of Reciprocity,” which states that if I give something to you, I have a right to expect equal or greater value in return…at a time of my choosing.

It is a natural reaction and that is why most sales people have a problem asking for referrals. We are asking for help - this creates an uncomfortable sense of obligation.

There are solutions to kickstart your referral business, of course!

First, instead of memorizing all the names in your name card folder, why not strengthen the relationship by bringing them into your community? Let them know you as a mutual FRIEND.

Here’s how to do that. Think of your favorite, ideal client? One who not only buys multiple products and services, but is also the kind of person you like and respect? What do you like and respect about this person? Are you looking for another client just like this one? Then let’s just speak the truth.

Tell your most ideal clients, “I’m looking for another you!” Then continue with, “I realize there isn’t anybody who is exactly like you but I also realize there ARE people who are similar.

Analyse your client’s strengths, characteristics, and traits to determine if he can provide a suitable referral. Ask your clients if they have any friends who are open minded, progressive and deeply involved with their family and community?

Someone who has the initiative and drive to get things done but still has time to make people around them feel important. Witty people who makes you feel you’re trusted and respected when you’re with them? Who do you know… who’s like you?”

Ask these questions in a relaxed setting. They’re going to feel better about you whether they give you names or not. If they do give you names, ask if anyone else comes to mind. Then ask if it’s ok to ask a few questions about each person.

Here are the questions!

* What caused (the person’s name) to come to mind?
* What do you like about them?
* What else do you like about them?
* What do you most respect about them?

Call the prospect and suggest to have a friendly conversation. Try to get your client to call ahead before following-up on the lead. This will greatly increase the permission to market your product/service.

Let’s say that your client is Smith who has referred you to Jones. Your client has called and suggested that Jones talk with you.

Your follow-up call might go like this:

“Jones, this is (your name). Smith suggested I give you a call and I promised I would. I’ve really been looking forward to talking with you because Joseph told me what he thinks of you."

"He said that you’re an open-minded person who is always interested in finding new ways to become more involved with your family and your community. He said that when he’s with you he always feels respected, trusted, and like you’re a part of his family. Am I talking to the right Jones?”

Normally…they’ll laugh! Then they’ll either “down play” the compliment or they’ll make a small joke about it. It’s normal to have a short conversation about your client.

When it’s appropriate, continue with, “Has Smith ever talked to you about the very special way we handle his finances?” They’re either going to say yes or no. If they say yes, ask them what they’ve heard then proceed with the rest of the conversation. If they say no, still... proceed with the rest of the conversation.

“Let me make this easy for us. I don’t know enough about your unique situation to know whether the very special way we help them with their finances would work for you or not. But it only takes a few minutes to find out. What do you think?”

Now, you just “walk them through” the process you use to determine if there is a match. Describing what your client likes, admires, and respects about the prospect enhances all three relationships, strengthens your community, and helps to provide a solid foundation upon which to build your new relationship with the prospect.

Before you know it, you have converted a referral who is a total stranger to your most valued client.